If you’re too hard on yourself

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A struggle that most of us endure from time to time is that we’re too hard on ourselves.

I just have to ask. Are you being too hard on yourself right now?

If you’re always in the mode of trying to fix, change, enlighten, “let it go,” then you’re likely not resting in the moment and enjoying life very much.

The thing is, if we’re treating ourselves that way, we’re more likely to treat our dear ones that way. Being hard on ourself goes hand in hand with being hard on our loved ones.

It’s not a friendly way to live.

Today I intend to remind you to lighten up on yourself in the name of self-compassion.

Take a deep breathe in, slow exhale and let your shoulders drop.

Daily life often takes enormous amounts of energy.

If we’re not able to see the forest through the trees and step back, where are we going?

Cut yourself some serious loving-kindness slack.

Know that your body won’t tolerate the pedal to the floor stress forever.

Your life is too precious to not generate more qualities of equanimity. You need those cozy little nooks of inner okay-ness and a place for a respite.

It’s not a race to the finish line.

Life is fleeting, we need to practice savoring it more than we do.

It’s all a practice isn’t it? Life, love, meaning, the whole shebang.

Here are a few ways to practice I’ve found that help me and a few others too:)

Go be with your loved ones and love them up. Yes to loving up your partners, children, parents,  and friends.

How about the others?  There is a whole world of people needing love, compassion, connection, authenticity.

Take that plate of cookies to the neighbor, call your friend you’ve been meaning to call, join the group, take the class, volunteer your time, go out into the world and BE with others.

Make friends with the world around you. Sometimes the best way to lighten up is to get out of your own way, your own head, your own inner sanctum.

Love your people. Show them your love. Be present and soak it all in.

Let your outpouring of love be a retreat for your soul.

Get into your zone, whatever it may be.

What’s your thing? Try new things. You like to knit? Knit. Write? Write. Paint a painting, paint an old chair. Ride your bike, go for a lake swim, take a fencing class, learn how to sing, read a biography, watch an inspired film, write to your Senator, start a foundation, work for social justice, cook a meal, make handmade soap, create a new company!, clean and redesign your closet, draw something, dance in your backyard, be a big brother or sister to a child, record music.

Creation. Create something. It doesn’t have to be genius.

Sometimes it’s our ego that steps in and tries to take over. The ego is not a bad thing. We need it to do important things in life. It’s just that we need to tame that ego beast and show it whose boss. We need to let the ego know when the soul needs rest.

You can lighten up and still have a full life I promise. In fact when you practice getting off your own back on a regular basis, you’ll discover the joy in it and want to do it more.

Take your foot off the pedal.

Smell the flowers.

Look in to the eyes of a loved one and let it be all there is.

You are a magnanimous human being and you deserve all of the love and tenderness life has to offer.

That is all.

Much Love,


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